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Enduring Loneliness: 30 Days w/ Teresa of Avila Day 15 &16 Reflections

Enduring Loneliness
30 Days with Teresa of Avila

Days 15 and 16 Reflections

Obedience in the modern culture, and enduring loneliness. Dan and Melissa discuss these forms of suffering from the perspective of St. Teresa as they reflect on her letters from the book 30 Days with Teresa of Avila.

Topics/Questions covered in the show:

  • Categories of suffering – beneficial vs. destructive.30DaysWithTeresaOfAvila
  • How is obedience related to humility, and why are they both necessary?
  • Resist, embrace, pursue – Three steps to spiritual growth through suffering.
  • Do you feel lonely or isolated from others due to your faith?
  • Can the pain of loneliness be good for us?
  • Finding peace and happiness in our loneliness.


  • 30 Days with Teresa of Avila – Dan Burke and Anthony Lilles
  • The Avila Institute for Spiritual Formation –
  • About Dr. Anthony Lilles
  • The Collected Works of St. Teresa of Avila, Volume One – contains The Book of Her Life
  • For Call in questions for future shows 818-646-7729 — please leave your name, location, and question.
  • Click on the arrow below to listen to the show! Don’t forget to tell your friends about the show and help us get the word out. If the show is inspiring to you and you would like to help us make it a daily show, please click here to donate. All donors will receive a signed copy of your choice of Dan’s new books: Finding God through Meditation30 Days with Teresa of Avila, or Navigating the Interior Life. Click HERE for mobile devices or on the arrow below to listen to the show:
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About Dan Burke

Dan is the President of the Avila Foundation, the parent organization of, the Avila Institute for Spiritual Formation, Divine Intimacy Radio and Divine Intimacy Radio - Resources Edition, Into the Deep Parish Programs, the Apostoli Viae (Apostles of the Way) Community, and the FireLight Student Leadership Formation Program, author of the award-winning book, Navigating the Interior Life - Spiritual Direction and the Journey to God, and his newest books Finding God Through Meditation-St. Peter of Alcantara, 30 Days with Teresa of Avila, Into the Deep and Living the Mystery of Merciful Love: 30 Days with Thérèse of Lisieux. Beyond his "contagious" love for Jesus and His Church, he is a grateful husband and father of four, the Executive Director of and writer for EWTN's National Catholic Register, a regular co-host on Register Radio, a writer and speaker who provides online spiritual formation and travels to share his conversion story and the great riches that the Church provides us through authentic Catholic spirituality. Dan has been featured on EWTN's Journey Home program and numerous radio programs.

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  • Jeanette

    I have said to other devout people that are lonely in the spiritual sense, “You are never lonely when you have Jesus.” It’s very true. I find that when you don’t have many people around you that cherish their faith in God like you do, you naturally practice the presence of God more often, bringing you even closer to Him. But, I never thought of how this could be God’s Will in detaching ourselves from too much dependence on others and lead us to depending on God in a fuller sense. This is a faith builder. Thank you and God bless!

  • MariaGo

    Thank you for this podcast! I really needed to hear it. 🙂

  • Judy Silhan

    Speaking of God sometimes wanting us to detach ourselves from a relationship resonated loud and clear. Though I did not end the relationship, it seems my friend has chosen to do so. Because she is of like mind, and because I had helped her to get through some very difficult situations, I did not see this coming. Our last brief encounter at Mass indicated she was moving on. At the Sign of Peace, she did not offer the embrace we had shared at Mass for the last six years, rather, she held out her hand to shake while looking at others. Listening to you, Dan, saying we can become too dependent or attached to someone, helped me make sense of what has happened as well as how to deal with the sadness of my heart. Thank you.

    • LizEst

      So sorry to hear this, Judy. I’ve found that Psalm 55 speaks to me in cases like this–though I know we do not have the full story here–as well as Psalm 22 (because it ends so confidently). God bless you, Judy.

      • Judy Silhan

        Thank you, Liz. I read over and thought about these two Psalms. They did help, especially Psalm 55.

        • LizEst

          May God be praised! So glad you found Psalm 55 especially helpful. God bless you, Judy!

    • MTQ

      Since you helped your friend through some very difficult situations, you may have become a threat because you know too much about her. You know her vulnerabilities and where she can be hurt. Another thought is that perhaps she thought she was becoming too dependent you. It may be helpful for you to examine what you think your dependency on her is/was. Peace be with you.

  • Diana Marie Winkler

    It is programs like this and reading the responses that help to say, “okay, I’m not the only one going through these feelings. I have found that as I grow closer to the Lord, depending on Him that my “circle” is getting smaller…and that’s okay! I don’t allow the number of friends to define my happiness. As long as I have the one true Friend, life is good!I am still able to be in the world without letting it make me feel there is something wrong with me because I don’t go along with so much of it. I am enjoying the inner peace. I am enjoying the person God is creating me to be. There are times I do have to detach myself from certain people, to love them from a distance.I am at a season of my life where I can now be confident, to plant my feet to not compromise when it comes to having the Lord as my constant companion. I do at times experience the loneliness of widowhood, but then I just call on my Heavenly Spouse to help me get through..and He does! Through it all whether it be about obedience or the spiritual loneliness I know that God has His reasons and in His timing I will be made aware of such…..and that’s a whole other subject on patience! God bless to all!

  • Gabriela

    Thank you so much for writing this wonderful book. Hearing both or your comments and wisdom, adds a lot to just reading the book. I’m also reading the Interior Castle to really celebrate the 500 year anniversary of St. Teresa of Avila. I have found myself asking her a lot for her intercession. God bless you both.

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